A new hope.

Even during the hardest of times, times of trials and hardships, I have been blindsided by how blessed I am. I have had my fair share of struggles and in doing so I have see so much good in the world. I have the ablility to do it. Even if it pains me.

Egg sellers for Easter on the side of the road have reminded me that I am doing well enough in my life. I have not been brought down to the point I have to sell thing s on the side of the road. I am able to support myself and I have found ways to get though almost anything that I am facing. On the days I am unable to do so, I have built a network of people to help me get through it.

I encourage you all, keep going. I believe in you and hope I can help share my strength to each and every one of you. Through the darkest, bleakest time of my life I am still pressing on. So many times I have almost quit and I didn’t. Let this post be a rallying cry for you.

Strength in numbers.

I share my stories and my life with you all and try to show that even in the worst of times, I have found ways to keep going. Share your story. Encourage someone as well. Comment where you see this. Share it with me or your friends. Do not hide yourself from the world. You deserve to be heard, loved, and respected.

Dear readers. I hope you see this post and feel uplifted. I hope you take 5 deep breaths and reset and center yourself. I hope you put on some of your favorite music and listen to a full song, uninterrupted, with your eyes close and sense peace. I pray that each one of you feel some comfort. It is what I can do from where I am.

#hugaplushie my friends

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The Month of Love

January was a rough month for me and mine. Between rounds of passing both versions of the flu around the house since December and trying to recover from the holiday break, I am exhausted. We are now in the second month of the year and romantic minds turn to love (along with most retail businesses who have had hearts up since New Years).

Last year I wrote every day for a full month on the importance of self care. I gave many examples of actions to take to show that YOU are special. To show someone very special they are important to you. Yourself. Learn to love and take care of yourself. I am sharing a link to the whole month for everyone. How many of these did you do? I would love to hear from anyone about how these worked for you.

The Self-care month.

Whenever I talk about how special people are and how much they are loved, I always remember Mr. Rogers. One of my very few heroes I look up too. This kind and gentle man showed everyone they were special.  He told the viewer every time on his show that they were special just the way they were. He told them he loved them. He had a genuine care for other humans. The impact of his life was felt by so many, myself included.

Looking around in the world today, we need more people to see the love and share the love. We need to tell more people we love them. We need more people to be told they are special.

I will gladly start.

If you are reading this, I want you to know that I love you. You are in this world and are a part of my life. This may be a one-sided conversation at the moment, but I want you to know that you are special to me. By being here, reading this, you have brought joy to my life. If we have known each other all my life, or we have never met, know that I think you are special, just the way you are.

Love yourself, and know I love you too, and now you have two people on your side. Go out and share that love. Show everyone the world is a better place with you in it.

Hug a plushie my friends.

My Triggered Moment

I have taught myself not to be triggered by anger about many things in my life. I feel that we all could use a bit of compassion to those who we disagree with. However, I came across a picture that is making it way across the social sites and my jaw fell open.

OK, wow. This is a very angry person. I understand they are wanting to be the tough love type. They are sadly misinformed and are quite judgmental.

You are telling a person who has “mental issues” and possibly other disabilities to go and do things without regards to what they are facing might be. You are telling someone to take a shower or eat something more than a cracker because they need to accept the responsibility of taking care of themselves. Does this person not realize that most of us want to do this but we cannot? That we struggle to find the energy to get of bed and make it to the bathroom? That we are not sulking teenagers who are just lazy and don’t want to clean our room?

This person is telling someone with mental issues to call friends and let them know that you are OK because they must be worried sick. Let that sink in for a second. You want a person who cannot make sound, mental healthy decisions to call someone for help. Not only do you want them to reach out, but you want them to apologize to others about how “I” don’t have the capacity or mental strength to do basic things in life. You want them to call and say that “I” need my space. Oxymoron much or is this going to be “crying for attention”?

I weep when I read things like this.

I understand self-care. I understand when it takes all you have to go and clean the kitchen and your body aches for the 2 hours it takes to get through it and you spend the next 2 trying to recover, but you do it because it needs to get done. Sometimes people need cute things to help them get the energy or confidence to take care of themselves. Sometimes we just need a security blanket to help us make it to the shower. Sometimes we need people to call US to check up on us and make sure we are OK.

Just because it may not work for you, why are you condemning it? I completely agree that making mental health issues cute is a terrible idea and does nothing to help the community. How is this person helping by belittling those who cannot take care of themselves BECAUSE THEIR BRAIN IS SICK!

Now I agree that responsibility is something that the community needs. Acknowledging what you have and what you need to do to take care of yourself is a tremendous step in living with a disability. Cute self-care works for some however, why would you take that away from them? Why are you forcing someone to fight through all the pain, mental stress, and more to pick up the phone and call you to let you know they are OK?

Tough love is a fine line. I feel this person missed it. By a wide margin. If you have someone that is like this in your life, please reconsider their role in your mental health recovery. You can find better people. I know they are out there.

#hugapony my friends

 

Staying Upbeat

I have taken a few days to wait and see how things have come along. I have been hoping to see cool things come out of my vBlog and I have been more than happy with the results. There have been trolls and criticism but nonetheless, I feel proud of everything.

2016 is going to be a positive change. I am going to push myself to make it a great year. I will not give in to the fear or sadness that so often tries consume me.

I have gotten a notebook to keep with me at all times, to write down ideas and to keep track of things going on around me. Again, always trying to keep the creative juices flowing. Its been helpful writing things down to keep them from fading or forgetting. I have enjoyed writing this past year and a half on here and it has brought back some of the artistic side of myself I have not seen in a long time.

I have been reading online about how when we have depression from a younger age, we don’t necessarily develop a personality. Not being able to identify or relate to anything makes it to were we cannot know who we really are. Its crazy, but I have seen myself enjoy things I have not in years. I see myself gaining new opinions and I just cannot believe it is from me. I feel I have stolen so many opinions and feelings from others because I could not form many of them myself. I see myself truly believing in what I think. I am standing up for myself.

I know 2016 has had a rough start with a lot of celebrity deaths and other craziness. I know that I will have rough times. All I can say is stand strong. I hope my encouragement will help you as it has helped me.

 

Hug a pony my friends.