Life on standby

I am on standby on life. With everything going on, I am struggling to just hang on. I have had so much life happen that it is overwhelming. Dealing with life while having a chronic illness takes an amazing amount of effort. I takes twice as much work and twice the effort and we bare this with the constant remarks of “Other people have it worse” or “Its not as bad as you think”.

It is as bad as we feel.

So I close this short post with the fact that I have life stuff. I am continuing to fight, both my illness and my problems. I hope I have the energy to keep going.

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Heartbreak and Loss.

Ok family and friends. I wanted to provide an update from this past weekend of a personal matter that arose. I know that many of my Convention friends did not get to say goodbye to me or Gale and I wanted to share some insight.

We had a miscarriage this past weekend. Gale was about 6 – 7 weeks along and we hadn’t told anyone. We have had a miscarriage in the past and we wanted to make it through the first trimester. It looks like there were some hormone imbalances that caused the miscarriage. We have been to the doctor several times now and it was confirmed today.

“My heart has joined the thousand, for my friend stopped running today.” My dear unborn child. I only got to listen to your heartbeat once, but it stopped mine completely. I will never be able to call your name, feed you, or take care of you, and for that I am sorry. I do believe we will meet again someday. I look forward to that day, and hope you do as well. Your mother and I love you. We will never forget you. Goodbye until next time.

Hug a pony my friends.